Avast ye defenders o' the free archipelagos, ye knights-errant o' the briny deep!
I be the gilded pirate Goldtooth Glittersleeves, Secretary o' the Treasure, and this be an official-like announcement - so set yer deadlights on me words and mark 'em well... It be my great honour to announce the release of the Gold Box!
Ah, the plunder has been a'flowin' heavy of late, and we at the Department have taken a portion of the surplus and appointed the finest of goldsmiths to fashion it into loot befitting our noble pirate natures and pack it into shiny Gold Boxes!
Aye, noble indeed! For hasn't it fallen upon us to put our courageous hearts to the test and battle the wickedest forces on the high seas, the fiercest of sea-monsters and to repeatedly send the Empire the message that they don't yet rule us all? Indeed, be we not the last free folk o' the sea, robbin' from the rich and givin' to the poor? True, the poor has mostly meant ourselves since most of us were as poor as wharf-rats when we first went "on the account" - but that don't take away the fact that we're an honorable and princely lot, says I!
It be in this spirit that we've created the Gold Boxes and distributed them to banks across the ocean, installing a shiny new golden safe in each bank to hold these grand new glittering goodies!
And in addition to the lustrous loot, we've engaged the services of exotic beast-tamers from the furthest reaches o' the world to add a rare few magickal beasties to the fare!
We've also employed gifted ship designers and ye'll be able to turn in yer Gold Box trinkets for glorious Gold Class Ship designs at ye olde Trading Post.
The first shipment be ready now, but after that, the Gold Box will only be available for a two week period every other month, since "acquiring" the raw materials takes a wee bit o' effort and not a few deeds of daring-do!
SO! If ye be needin' even more explanation than all that, feast yer eyes on this summary o' all the fiddly details. Otherwise, put on yer fancy boots, stump yer intrepid ol' bones down to yer island bank and TREAT YERSELF. Ye've earned it, mate!
T. Hieronymous "Goldtooth" Glittersleeves
Secretary, Department o' the Treasure